


Team Muck Up

by Dunster (JadedCoral)



Category: Twenty One Pilots
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Crack, M/M, Silly, stupid
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-28
Updated: 2016-05-28
Packaged: 2018-07-10 19:02:51
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,159
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7000858
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JadedCoral/pseuds/Dunster
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Fairly Local High School's basketball team keeps a secret secondary log book of their captain.</p><p>Or, the one where Fairly Local High School's basketball team mistakenly think of themselves as the good guys, Tyler is so dun with his team, the cheerleaders are owed many favors and Josh gets abducted by an alien.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Team Muck Up

**Author's Note:**

  * Translation into Tiếng Việt available: [[Vietnamese translation] Team Muck Up](https://archiveofourown.org/works/9669005) by [higherthan_ (all_their_intricacies)](https://archiveofourown.org/users/all_their_intricacies/pseuds/higherthan_)



> Sometimes I feel like I should sit down and wonder why I write the things I write. Do you? 
> 
> Anyway, as I know nothing about basketball, during the two minutes of research I bothered to do, I took the position names point guard, shooting guard, small forward, power forward and center and turned them into code names for the oc characters in this monstrosity. Tyler'd probably be 1st Point, but is now titled Captain, in case you were wondering.

 

 

 

**Secret Secondary Log Book of Fairly Local High School's Basketball Team**

 

If found, we kindly ask you to return this log book to the team.

Also, don't tell Captain this thing exists, plz.

 

 

**Opening entry**

Team has finally received an answer --due to 1st Power and 2nd Small's inability to keep their big, fat mouths shut-- as to why Captain is not dating any of the girls who have shown interest towards the topic in question.

When finally confronted about this, Captain calmly stated:

 

-Quote-

_Mostly because I'm gay._

-Unquote-

 

Above discovery made Team feel collectively uneasy. Team agrees Captain is a great guy, but thinks it might be awkward to henceforth change and shower after practice with Captain present. When this issue was brought up by 1st Center, Captain's response after a good, long look at Team was:

 

-Quote-

_Don't worry, I have standards._

-Unquote-

 

Team was left feeling a bit insulted.

 

**2 nd Entry**

Thus far Team practices have proceeded without any gay incidents, although it should be mentioned that 1st Shoot asked Captain to rate the bottom belonging to the loudmouth in question, and got a solid 7 without even so much as a look given in its direction. When asked about the evaluation scale, Captain promised to reveal it if Team ups their practice hours and wins the next game against Hometown High School.

All Shoots tsked, but were later on heard planning to drop some subjects to be able to fit more practice hours into their schedules. A fight for the right to ask Captain out for coffee might also have been mentioned, but the source of this claim is unclear, so this remains unconfirmed.

However, based on many discussions held between a colorful variety of parties, it is universally agreed that Captain should definitely have a boyfriend.

 

**3 rd Entry**

Apparently Captain has grown tired of shooting down requests for caffeinated company from various members of Team as well as other Fairly Local High School Attendees of the male variety, having now made an open declaration that only someone who can win Captain in a mano-a-mano on the basketball court will even be considered a viable option.

Captain's doubt in Team's ability to accept the challenge and actually win has got everyone fired up. Whether it leads to a date or not, a counter-declaration about Captain's inevitable downfall has been made.

On other news, Team's skills have improved drastically due to extra practice. Just in time for the oncoming match!

 

**4 th Entry**

Team deserves 10 points for handling an incident in a most professional and discreet fashion.

As a needless mention, the basketball game against Hometown High School was of course won by Fairly Local High School. A team does simply not have a captain as cool as Captain and then lose. However, there was a failed attempt at sabotage at the beginning of the game, which could have lost Team its just victory.

Matters occurred as follows:

Along with Hometown High School's basketball team, Fairly Local High School's hosted event was also visited by some other students of the rival school, who participated as members of the audience, including this pink-haired punk whom Captain wouldn't stop staring at upon spotting the sore thumb sticking out from the crowd. Reportedly Captain looked elsewhere only after accidental eye-contact was made between the two parties, quickly turning away in embarrassment from having been caught being so rude, witnesses claim.

In Captain's defense, a lot of stares were shared between the representatives of each school that day.

But this was not the incident previously referred to.

The actual incident occurred a little before the game started, whilst players were mingling on the court and audience had only half sat down. There is some debate about the course of events that led to Captain risking it and breaching the enemy territory, Team arguing it was most definitely due to being beckoned by the punk, others stating Captain's actions had been fueled by own volition. Either way, there was Captain, casually talking to the punk sitting on the first row of the Hometown High School's side of the audience, when suddenly the punk had the audacity to pull on Captain's shirt to close any distance remaining between them and whisper something that Team can only assume were threats into Captain's ear just before the match.

Though the situation was quickly over before any of the Shoots or Centers had the time to intervene, Captain still looked utterly spooked upon returning to stand by Team. Concerned about the flustered, wide-eyed look and the occasional nervous over-shoulder glances cast at the general direction of the kid who had Captain so spooked, Team made inquiries about what had transpired between the two of them.

Team's suspicions were immediately roused by Captain's vehement denials of anything having happened, and so once Coach took Captain to the side for some last minute briefing, Team decided to act.

As a result of quickly made deals and previously gained good relations with Fairly Local High School's Volleyball team, Team Volleyball was assigned to get rid of target Spooky during one of the intervals or at the end of the game at the latest.

It cost Team some personal favors and a lot of energy drinks, but when the game was won, Spooky was nowhere to be seen.

For sure, Spooky shall now serve as an excellent example for any aspiring bullies on what will happen to anyone who tries to come at Captain!

 

**Quick addition to 4 th entry**

To distract Captain from the previous episode and to celebrate the victory in a flashier manner, Team carried Captain around school grounds regardless of the continuous litany of complaints this lead to, though despite whining about being held above the ground, Captain seemed to make most of the situation and kept scanning the surroundings intently as if looking for something specific.

Once finally returned on the ground, Captain inquired about the dwellers of Hometown High School with poorly feigned disinterest. Proud of its achievements concerning the elimination of a certain threat, Team revealed the story behind the successful banishment of target Spooky done in cooperation with Team Volleyball, to which Captain's response was:

 

-Quote-

_You did what!?_

-Unquote-

 

It is safe to assume that the disbelief heard in Captain's voice was due to relief and thankfulness. Even if Captain then proceeded to fume and give Team the silent treatment after having hogged all the energy drinks left from the bribery batch delivered to Team Volleyball.

It was agreed that this behavior was probably ignited by the embarrassment derived from the fact that nobody wants to admit to having been bullied, especially someone with such a status to upkeep as Captain has. As a final attempt to uplift the mood, before Team would willingly succumb to being on the receiving end of Captain's frustrations, 1st Shoot asked with an awkward laugh about the ass-evaluation scale Captain had promised to reveal in case of victory, receiving the following answer:

 

-Quote-

_On a scale that tips over because you're all stupid dumb-asses!_

-Unquote-

 

Despite Captain's current moodiness, everyone agrees that celebrations over today's achievements are in order!

 

**5 th Entry**

A pink-haired menace has been spotted too near the borders of Fairly Local High School on several occasions during the past month. Granted, it is quite the small town where these occurrences take place in, but something like this has never been considered problematic until the infamous incident that happened just before the basketball game previously held between Fairly Local High School and Hometown High School.

When Squad Cheerlead was sent to spy on the potential enemy, they returned bearing the following information:

The pink-haired spooky punk is called Jim (or something like that, beginning with a J, maybe), is often accompanied by a couple of friends, invariably stops to try and pet any cats passing by and has a really cute smile.

Needless to say, Team shan't appoint any more stalking tasks to Squad Cheerlead if they are this easily beguiled. Still, payment is owed for their services, and concerning this, someone really needs to come up with an excuse to the Captain as to why Team has lost 2 hours per week of pre-allocated practice time on the court to the cheerleaders for the next two months.

On another note, 2nd Point and 1st Small have volunteered to go and rough Spooky Jim up to make sure Captain can continue to live life without having to worry about the existence of such villainy.

 

**6 th Entry**

Spooky Jim is great! Squad Cheerlead was not lying about the nice smile, which was bestowed upon Platoon Rough Up from the moment the interaction began and continued on till infinity. Platoon instantly agreed that a smile that nice cannot harbor any malicious intents.

So the plan to have a harsh talk between the mentioned parties, excluding Squad Cheerlead, behind the fast-food restaurant near Hometown High School was quickly aborted, and the party of three ended up inside the restaurant instead. To prove the non-existence of ill-intentions and as an act of possible comradeship, Platoon Rough Up offered to pay for the food, and in turn Spooky Jim praised Captain's cuteness with words Team can surely wholeheartedly agree with.

Also, while Spooky Jim liked the code name given by Team, the possibility to change it to Drummer was discussed. Platoon Rough Up are advocates to this request.

In conclusion, Platoon Rough Up suggests the re-evaluation of Spooky Jim's threat status.

 

**7 th Entry**

Team Council has in unison deemed the previous entry completely false, and has decided that 2nd Point and 1st Small shall be sentenced for fraternizing with the enemy. Henceforth their punishment will be 5 minutes of idle waiting on the sidelines once the boxes have been opened on Team Pizza Nights until otherwise stated.

Also, Spooky Jim shan't be referred to as Drummer.

Another issue that was brought up in the council meeting was Captain's ongoing silent strike. Team is mystified as to what might be the cause behind this prolonged sulk, but when any volunteers for this inquiry task were asked to raise their hands, none did. It seems like the times of self-sacrifice are over, and have been replaced by what, hesitancy? This will be written down as the lowest point of team-spirit ever encountered this year.

When Team turned to seek help from Squad Cheerlead in these desperate times, their initial response was to smirk as if they had the foreknowledge that Team would have no say in the future negotiations about the cost of their services.

Honestly, the things we do for Captain...

 

**8 th Entry**

Apparently Team has mucked up.

Mucked up real bad.

Squad Lead, also known as one of Captain's dearest friends, finally had the heart to explain what had actually transpired between Captain and Spooky Jim on that fateful day and, surprisingly, even before that.

It turns out the first meeting between the two of them had taken place before the game, at a party where 2nd Power had left Captain stranded because apparently some hookup had been more important than keeping the promise of driving Captain home before ten o'clock, which had been the sole reason Captain had agreed to take part in such activities in the first place. Cue Spooky Jim offering Captain a ride home instead, during which a lot of nonsensical topics had been discussed even long after the car had been parked in front of the destination, it having been way past curfew once both finally agreed to part ways, _still_ too shy to exchange phone numbers.

As the explanation proceeded, it was also brought up that what Team had interpreted to be bullying had actually been flirting, and in fact, it hadn't been Spooky Jim's intention at all to sabotage the game, because the whisper had consisted of a bet that should Fairly Local High School win, Captain would receive Spooky Jim's phone number. This would also explain the intense pep talk Captain had held before the game and the professional-level approach to the game throughout the match. Although it should also be mentioned that had Fairly Local High School lost the game, then, as stated by the rules of the bet, Spooky Jim would have received Captain's phone number instead, which is just, well.

Captain's just a really competitive guy, okay?

In summary: Captain and Spooky Jim are really into each other, Team has really mucked up by keeping them apart and preventing Captain from receiving a phone number and Squad Cheerlead is owed a really, really big favor.

To fix the situation as discreetly as possible, Team Council has initiated operation Kidnap.

 

**9 th Entry**

To ensure the proper feel of a kidnapping, volunteers 1st Center, 2nd Center and 2nd Shoot have been provided with masks left over from last Halloween. Though to not get the actual authorities involved, Convoy Kidnap has also been instructed  to be polite about the abduction as well as to wear Team uniform to give a hint whose van Spooky Jim had just been ushered into in case any witnesses were present at the time.

After rumors about the operation had spread throughout Fairly Local High School, Crafts Club was kind enough to provide Convoy Kidnap with a black tote bag, free of charge. When Squad Cheerlead was informed about this selfless transaction, a lot of eye-rolling took place.

Once preparations had been completed, 2nd Power declared operation Kidnap commenced.

 

**10 th Entry**

Operation Kidnap went smoothly.

Convoy Kidnap reports the following exchange took place:

 

-Quote-

_May we abduct you?_

-Unquote-

 

To which Spooky Jim's reportedly a bit spacey response after a long, good look at 2nd Center's alien mask was:

 

-Quote-

_Please do, yes._

-Unquote-

 

After which Convoy Kidnap placed the black tote bag over Spooky Jim's head, directed the abductee into the car and drove back to Fairly Local High School with the highly important cargo on board.

Which is why Team now has Spooky Jim sitting on a chair in the middle of the basketball court with a black tote bag hiding the surprise that is the nice smile mentioned by various parties over the course of this log.

Won't Captain be so pleased to receive this surprise!

 

**11 th Entry**

Captain does not seem pleased at all about the surprise Team had gone through the trouble to arrange. In fact, the voice Captain used to shout the following was rather high-pitched and verging on the levels of a mental breakdown:

 

-Quote-

_What have you done!?_

-Unquote-

 

According to Captain, kidnapping people, no matter how polite one is whilst performing the act, is not okay in any circumstances. This ongoing rant on morals lasted all the way until Captain reached the supposed victim placed on full display and managed to remove the black tote bag, the revelation of what was hidden underneath immediately leading to momentary silence.

Until the admittedly disappointing first reaction of:

 

-Quote-

_Oh no._

-Unquote-

 

After which a bit more wordless staring between Captain and Spooky Jim took place, before Captain burst into an unnecessary litany of apologies like:

 

-Quote-

_Oh my gosh, I'm so sorry! My team is an idiot, I swear I had nothing to do with this, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, you must think this is so weird and you probably hate me-_

-Unquote-

 

Et cetera, et cetera, whilst taking Spooky Jim's hands and inspecting the wrist area ever though Convoy Kidnap hadn't event tied the victim up, until Spooky Jim finally interrupted, saying:

 

-Quote-

_Hey, don't worry, I actually agreed to this. And besides, being brought to you is way better than being abducted by an alien._

-Unquote-

 

Which, okay, could be a romantic thing to say, Team reluctantly agrees, if both parties involved were really, _really_ weird. Which is apparently the case, because the next addition to the dialog was a relieved, teary-eyed:

 

-Quote-

_Really?_

-Unquote-

 

Which Spooky Jim confirmed by standing up, running a thumb over Captain's cheek and stating:

 

-Quote-

_Really, really._

-Unquote-

 

While finishing it off with a really nice smile.

After this Captain was reportedly seen walking towards the sunset hand-in-hand with Spooky Jim, where they proceeded to play video games and drink energy drinks until next Monday.

Though the used methods should perhaps be re-evaluated, it is still safe to confirm that Team's relationship goals set for Captain have finally been achieved.

 

**12 th Entry**

It has been a while since the last entry, but seeing as another incident concerning the Captain happened, Team felt the obligation to report about it.

This was in a similar setting as the incident mentioned in Entry 4, taking place just before a basketball match being held between Fairly Local High School and Hometown High School. Teams were mingling on the court and audience was only half sat down, when Captain drifted to the enemy territory again, exchanging a few words with the now violet-haired individual sitting on the front row.

Knowing their relationship status, Team thought nothing of this exchange, until the punk dragged Captain closer by the Team shirt and whispered something against Captain's ear.

Though the situation was quickly over before any of the Shoots or Centers had the time to intervene, Captain still looked utterly spooked upon returning to stand by Team. Concerned about Captain's reddened, wide-eyed look and the occasional nervous over-shoulder glances cast at Spooky Jim's general direction, Team made inquiries about what had transpired between the two of them.

Team's suspicions were immediately roused by Captain's vehement and highly flustered denials of anything having happened, though having learned from past mistakes, Team was hesitant to jump into immediate action and let the matter be.

Until the match against Hometown High School was lost and the grin on Spooky Jim's face didn't seem so nice anymore.

Team Council agrees this should be investigated further, though before any decisions are made, it should be mentioned that the services of Squad Cheerlead can no longer be afforded.

1st Small has promised to look into the price range of the Crafts Club. More on this as things proceed.

 

**Last Entry**

Team's Secret Secondary Log Book was discovered by Captain.

While oddly touched, Captain stated that Team should stop keeping a log on the gay-ass romance transpiring between Captain and Spooky Jim, for it is very nosy.

Also, a demand for apologies was made, which Team has agreed to pay in the form of extra practice, the irony of which failed to fly past anyone's understanding considering this was done for someone who had lost a game --a reference to the previously mentioned incident-- because of a bet where sexual favors were at stake, some say.

But as loudly stated by a red-faced Captain, that is none of Team's business.

So on that note,

Team out.

 


End file.
